Dirt cheap DIY fertilizer without composting?

Hi all! I'm poor. I'm attempting to get my balcony garden started without spending more than 30 dollars. (I'm probably nuts, I know.) It looks like a good chunk of that will be going to a water hose and sink attachment so I don't have to haul a milk jug of water back and forth a hundred times, so I'm hurting a bit on funds for fertilizer. To make matters worse, the landlord says I'm not allowed to compost anywhere in the apartment or on the property. (I would just hide it under my kitchen sink, what she doesn't know won't hurt her etc, but there's other reasons why I can't unfortunately.)

Is there any option for fertilizing my plants with like... five dollars left? If I mix coffee grounds and eggshells into the soil will it do anything other than bother the local slugs? I've seen that stuff about letting plant scraps sit in a bucket to make "tea" but what I read said it can't replace fertilizer - is there a way to make it so that it can?

I have a bag of epsom salts, a strong appetite for veggies, and the willingness to steal the neighbor's lawn clippings if I must.

I'm also willing to accept that I may have to forgo the water hose C:

EDIT: Thank you all for suggestions! Here's what I'm going to try in no particular order:

• Grass clippings and banana peels in water to make tea
• Getting a med-free friend to pee in a jar and letting that sit for two months
• Reach out to local Buy Nothing group and gardening groups to see if someone has leftover fertilizer or compost
• Steal dirt from local megacorp office to save money on dirt and spend that on fertilizer instead
• Ask around to see if anyone keeps fish so I can use the aquarium water
• Reach out to local mushroom farm to see if they'd give me their growing medium
• Skip the faucet hose and spend the money on some decent cheap fertilizer from Costco