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Rochelle

@ appledinosaurcat @beehaw.org

Posts
12
Comments
81
Joined
2 yr. ago

  • Feeling depressed and confused after hooking up - please help me out friends?

    Jump

  • Thank you so much for your input! Unfortunately, people love to gossip in this org so it'd be high risk and I really find that internet communities give great objective insight. Your comment is an example of that! I needed to hear this: The two options are “fuck yes” or “fuck no”, and not something in between. Powerful. I am exhausted of the in-betweens, the ones who are lukewarm and give half effort and yet expect full effort in return. I'm not getting any younger, and I'm still single when everywhere on social media someone's getting engaged or married. It gets really hard to stay optimistic and hopeful that something will come around. But I guess that's what many others are experiencing too. Anyway, from one internet stranger to another (or who knows, some of us may have crossed paths without realizing), I'll just keep looking for the "fuck yes" and not waste my time with another something in between which should immediately be recognized as a "fuck no".

  • Feeling depressed and confused after hooking up - please help me out friends?

    Jump

  • I appreciate it! I know you're not dumb because you've shared so much wisdom in just a few comments. It's helped me to feel better about it all

  • Feeling depressed and confused after hooking up - please help me out friends?

    Jump

  • Thank you so much. Should I have a real talk with him? I always feel like I need closure and I'm not sure if he was sober enough to fully understand that I want to keep this private being that we're in this professional organization and all my friends saw us chatting

  • Feeling depressed and confused after hooking up - please help me out friends?

    Jump

  • Thank you so much. I agree but is it possible he was dreaming/sleeptalking and it wasn’t directed at me? Because he claims that he doesn't remember anything after hitting the bed. Should I have a real talk with him? I'm not sure it registered deeply enough that I want to keep this private being that we're in this professional organization

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    Feeling depressed and confused after hooking up - please help me out friends?

  • Technology @beehaw.org
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    Green crosshair highlights in Excel spreadsheet will not go away, no matter how many online solutions I've tried!

  • Ghosted by a guy who's been giving mixed signals for months, his friends say we would make a cute couple, I spent a month trying to get over him. Really sad/confused now. Please help me out, friends?

    Jump

  • Thank you so much for your advice! Your comment reminded me of a rather key moment that happened:

    He and his friend picked a guy to matchmake me with, I said he’s not my type, to which my crush asked “who is your type?” but I didn’t get a chance to respond because his friend interrupted. Right after that, he called me bro again, and I asked him straight up “Do you see me as a bro?” He clammed up and seemed like he wanted to say something more, but just said “What?” while smiling after a silence, and I said “What?” back. At one point, we were almost cuddling and his voice got cute/soft; he also initiated a hug late that night.

    I like the idea of asking our mutual friend to help me out and ask him directly if he's interested in me that way. I've already chatted with his friend, hinting at my feelings, but I haven't asked him to open the dialogue on their side. His friend seems very supportive and said that we would be a cute couple together. For additional context, he also did mention that the earliest he will start dating is after this strenuous work period which goes until mid-December. Given the timeline, do you think this should be as soon as the work wraps up right before the holidays, or wait until next year? Not sure if I can keep waiting in frustration especially wanting to make the most of the time off.

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    Ghosted by a guy who's been giving mixed signals for months, his friends say we would make a cute couple, I spent a month trying to get over him. Really sad/confused now. Please help me out, friends?

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • Thank you so much. I agree and it's just that we have to be on good terms with one another in this program and be nice on the surface even if maybe we don't like certain people. Question now is what should I, and we collectively as a group, do? If you can share insight on my questions in the post specifically regarding next steps, it will be so helpful.

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • Thank you for sharing. Does that change at all if we are not currently at a workplace as in a company, but it is still a professional career-oriented program? I'm really not sure where else I am supposed to find a partner if not at a place where everyone is around the same age and well-rounded, especially when there's this time constraint. Dating is difficult!

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • I agree, thank you for sharing!

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • Any advice or suggestions on how to handle this situation? It is getting increasingly weirder and I want to do what I can to salvage it or at least not be distracted by all this.

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • There are two girls. One is the mystery girl he said he thinks he likes. She's not as important in this context. Ann, the girl I was closer to in the beginning, is the one that I have an issue with now. She got too comfortable and started spewing negativity in the group text we share with this other female friend of ours (not mentioned in post). She complained a lot so I responded less and less. She always tried to get our mutual friend to listen to her and actively went against my suggestions because she herself is so insecure. She said hi from behind me but I didn't see who she was with (it was Bob/Ed and she didn't bother to even clue me in, knowing I would've wanted to say hi). She never sits with the guys when I initiate it, but always likes to sit with them when she herself brings them together. After I created this chat, which by the way was so spontaneous and based on the guys I was sitting with (which I thought she was going to join us too), she then lied about sitting with our mutual friend in a class whereas that did not happen. So I think that's enough strikes and it doesn't mean crap if we happened to spend a bit of time before even officially starting the program.

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • I know it's confusing but I feel the need to clarify after reading your comment. Thank you for sharing first of all. It was not that I wanted to exclude her due to competition over him. In fact, I asked him enthusiastically wanting to know who he liked at that time, and therefore who he was considering bringing in. We were basically bros at that point and I hadn't thought of him that way at all. He didn't want to speak too soon and said he'll see how things unfold. I actually figured it out later on, when she was flirting with one of the guys from our group, and vice versa. He saw all of this and looked pretty bummed. So I would be a hypocrite if I expected drama free space with the bros yet actively instigated drama, which I do not believe I am? Just trying to understand, based on the definition of hypocrisy.

    So, should I tell them the truth? Or at least the one I like? I did mention that I spent more time with them in the past before I had a chance to branch out more and meet new people which is what I always like to do.

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • Thank you so much! I'm afraid the updates might change your take? It's a personal group text with all of them, and it's getting weird. I don't know how to salvage this. I want to be friends and stay professional overall, while tapping into potential with the guy I like, but then again I don't know if it's time for me to just distance myself from the group. He also doesn't really text me individually and hasn't asked me to spend time one on one, so I fear the group text prevents this.

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • I would certainly say so. I've added more context above and my head gets jumbled when I meet with the guys. I do feel this awkwardness stemming from how the group text started, and pressure to add a girl, and that we're all just trying to make it work. But I'm not sure if it's just me reading too much into it or my romantic feelings getting in the way? What should I do, and should I explain the behind the scenes context or will that make things worse?

  • I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

    Jump

  • Please see updates in the post. I would really appreciate your advice here!

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    I am the only woman in a group text with 8 guy friends in a professional program - I would really appreciate your thoughts on this and why: is this acceptable/not a big deal? Weird? Scandalous?

  • My guy friend and I got friendly at nightclub (hugs, no kiss), then had awkward chat shutting it down, while I'm figuring out if I like his best friend; he wants to tell him! What should I do?

    Jump

  • Thank you for sharing. I'm worried about the extremely awkward conversation I had with Bob and that he will harp on that rather than the hugs thing when talking to his friend. That conversation sent everything in a spiral and became this huge pain point that can undermine my friendship with his friend (most important to me out of all this), more than the hugs themselves. Ugh I hate that this happened and am afraid of the consequences or that it'll change all dynamics. Won't his friend feel like I'm hiding something or not being honest if I don't proactively communicate with him? Or, would this be a don't tell if he doesn't ask? Is it more likely that bringing this up will open a new box of problems and backfire?

  • My guy friend and I got friendly at nightclub (hugs, no kiss), then had awkward chat shutting it down, while I'm figuring out if I like his best friend; he wants to tell him! What should I do?

    Jump

  • I hear you and that's always wise, but I'm really not sure where I'm supposed to meet someone. At extracurricular clubs or people from completely other professional teams at this organization?

  • My guy friend and I got friendly at nightclub (hugs, no kiss), then had awkward chat shutting it down, while I'm figuring out if I like his best friend; he wants to tell him! What should I do?

    Jump

  • Thank you for sharing. I'm struggling because his friend is one of my closest friends, and I don't want to jeopardize that. I feel like I did start to get emotionally attached during my deep conversation with his friend yesterday. Do you think it's not a good idea because they're such best buddies and will put bro code above me? Should I talk to his friend today when we're one on one in person? If so, what should I even say without obliterating all potential of friendship developing into something more with him (the friend)? There are a lot of politics here too so whatever happens, we all need to at least be on good terms with each other.

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    My guy friend and I got friendly at nightclub (hugs, no kiss), then had awkward chat shutting it down, while I'm figuring out if I like his best friend; he wants to tell him! What should I do?

  • Technology @beehaw.org
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    How to efficiently remove duplicate photos across multiple Google Photos accounts?

  • When you get a call from a middle-aged male coworker who had tried to coerce you (younger female) into letting him drop you off at home on a Saturday night: do you call back, text, email, or ignore?

    Jump

  • I am so uncomfortable because of the new developments! He not only called but Facetimed me, and obviously does not want to have a trail. I am glad he ignored the reply I sent back via work email at the time but I thought that was it and he has resurfaced. What are your thoughts on the new developments described in my response to Aphelion above? This is so uncomfortable and I feel trapped!

  • When you get a call from a middle-aged male coworker who had tried to coerce you (younger female) into letting him drop you off at home on a Saturday night: do you call back, text, email, or ignore?

    Jump

  • Thank you for your advice. I want to so badly but I'm so afraid they will retaliate and slander my name especially because I'm not sure what my next career steps are and that could jeopardize future opportunities in the same line of work. What are your thoughts on the new developments described in my response to Aphelion above? This is so uncomfortable and I feel trapped!

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    I'm falling for a long-distance "bad boy trying to turn good" who has PTSD and traumatic family/past, afraid of it possibly being mistake but I'm not ready to let go: What should I do?? Please help!

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    When you get a call from a middle-aged male coworker who had tried to coerce you (younger female) into letting him drop you off at home on a Saturday night: do you call back, text, email, or ignore?

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    Should I text him back if we've each ghosted one another for a month at a time and had great phone calls before even going on a date that didn't go well? Please read post for full context

  • Technology @beehaw.org
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    I saved spreadsheet when Excel was glitching (corporate remote network), time stamp got updated however file reverted to original state with reboot - please help!

  • Asklemmy @lemmy.ml
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    Should I date now if I have to move in a few months to a place that is hours away by car and would likely have more potential suitors?

  • Chat @beehaw.org
    Rochelle @beehaw.org

    Please help: What's your take on woman drinking guy's beer without asking after he starts dancing with her?